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10 Things That Are Different Than What I Expected
As I continue to walk this unexpected, undesired road of loss, there continue to be things I simply did not understand or expect. I have written previously about things I thought I knew that I simply did not know; or at least I did not understand it to the depth that I do now. Some… Continue reading
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The Goads
We have several situations right now as a family that feel deeply challenging. So challenging, in fact, that I am unsure how they will work out. This uncertainty stirs anxiety and fear for me. While I am fighting to trust that God has a plan and his plan is good, I also continue to wrestle… Continue reading
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Addressed to Our Betters
I have recently been reading “A Grief Observed” by C.S. Lewis. The book is a memoir of the grief Lewis experienced when his wife died of cancer. The chapters, which he never intended to be published, are excerpts from his raw journal entries written after losing his wife. Lewis ended up publishing them, but he… Continue reading
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Restoration
I’ve been thinking a lot lately about the concept of restoration. I think for me, I am realizing that there are a lot of ideas and words that float around Christian sub-culture that sound really amazing, but when I sit down and really chew on what the ideas mean, I realize I can’t actually put… Continue reading
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Might As Well Get It Over With
It’s that season where we start to come out of the holiday slump. People are back at their routines. New Years resolutions have been made. Holiday travel has been completed. We’re through the holidays, but they are close enough in the rearview mirror that everyone still asks about them. “How was your Christmas? Your New… Continue reading
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10 Things I Thought I Knew
I thought I knew a lot about grief and grieving. I am an empath; I feel things deeply. We have been in full time ministry for more than two decades and have walked with countless people through pain, suffering, loss, divorce, and sickness. There is little that we have not encountered with others. Before we… Continue reading
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There Is No Formula
When I was in my early 20’s, anxiety became a very real and painful part of my story. I accumulated years of sleepless nights as panic attacks would haunt me in the dark. I cannot count the number of times I prayed Philippians 4:6-7, “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer… Continue reading
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And Epidural for the Heart
I was a big fan of the epidural. The Bible says that pain in child bearing is a curse and I saw the epidural as a mercy from God to alleviate some of the pain that came with that curse. It was glorious! With my first four pregnancies, I had plenty of time to receive… Continue reading
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I Wish Grief Was Different
I wish grief was different than it is. While there is absolutely a clear starting point, there is no end… at least not one that is in sight. I wish there were milestones. I wish there were clearly defined marks that once passed, gave assurance you would never go back. I wish that grief had… Continue reading
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Nearness
When Ezra was sick, the 7th floor of Children’s Hospital, the cancer floor, was full of children fighting that cursed disease. There were parents who wore the battle scars of life at the hospital; the wrinkled clothes and messy hair, the simple meals in the kitchen area, the always present 7th floor sticker-name-badge, the dried,… Continue reading
Faithful Paradox 